Sunday, September 28, 2008

Why do I do that?

I'm a knuckle cracker. I also believe in equal opportunity for my joints. If I crack one finger I have to crack them all. If I need to crack one twice I have to give it's mate at least a chance to crack again. If I crack one wrist I have to crack the other. I have a routine that gets every joint so nobody feels left out.
I am a knee bouncer. I don't bounce my knees all the time, but if they have to bounce, they have to bounce. One time I was in front of a congregation in a choir. I was bouncing those knees like there was no tomorrow. The woman next to me asked if I could stop because she was an epileptic and she thought I was going to give her a seizure. I had to stop. I did, but the effect was huge. I began to itch as if I had poison ivy. I spent the next hour and 10 min. itching and scratching. It was awful. I laugh when I think of it now, but then I thought I was going to die.
I step on the cracks but only with my right foot. It's a marching band habit, and I can't break it.
After pouring a bowl of cereal I have to make sure every morsel has been dunked before I can take a bite. I have to continue dunking the whole bowl before each bite. This drives my husband nuts. I also separate everything I eat. I eat the outside of the sandwich first. Then when I have just the middle left I eat the vegetables, then the bread, then the meat, then the cheese. Pizza is toppings, crust, cheese. Ho-Hos are outside coating, then scoop out the filling, eat the cake, and then eat the filling. I eat M&Ms, skittles, fruit snacks and cereals one color at a time. First yellow, then green, then orange, then brown, then red, then purple, then pink. Well with M&Ms greens are last but the rest is in their proper order.
I don't string my string cheese. I just eat it like I would eat a carrot.
Why do I do these things and what would happen if I stopped? I'm afraid to find out after what happened with the knees. The thing that bothers me about this, is that I can do all these things with exactness. I never let these habits down. But there are important things that really matter that I want to make into habits. I try and I try, but I still haven't mastered them. Why do I have needs of things that don't matter, that don't make a difference, and that are totally useless, and I can't manage to read to my child everyday for 15 min. That would be a great thing to have to do everyday or else itch like crazy. Why can't organizing my desk be like cracking my knuckles where I just have to do it, or I can't do or think about anything else? How do I make my goals into my needs, my have-tos? I'm serious. I want answers, tips, and suggestions.

Thursday, September 18, 2008


Okay, I realize I haven't done posts for awhile and even though I just finished a new one, I decided to write a second one as well, for my loyal fans who have been deprived for about two weeks.
I'm going to school right now. It takes me about 30 min. to get to school. So I have that time to think to myself, and occasionally talk to myself. Sometimes I'll just crank up the radio to my favorite stations and sing along, but other times I'm just thinking, pondering, and imagining. I actually enjoy it.
Today I was thinking about the fears I had as a child. Of course I was afraid of death like I think most children are. I remember being grateful for living across the street from the EMS and the fire department. I remember feeling bad for people who lived out in the country because they would probably die before anyone could get to them, yet I thought, that's too bad for them but I'm lucky because I'll be rescued before I die. This is what I thought about today because I saw a fire truck and some police drive past me.
Other times I think about projects I can do. I plan things and get excited. If only I could write things down while I was driving.
Other times a song will remind me of something. I'll start daydreaming about whatever and then next thing you know I just went through an intersection. I look in the mirror to make sure it was a green light. Luckily it always has been so my auto pilot is still working. Usually when I am thinking about a memory I decide I need to call the person the memory was with. That's when I start daydreaming about the conversation I'm going to have with that person when I get home. Then the next thing you know, I'm pulling in the drive-way.
It so much fun driving by myself. So what do you do when you're driving somewhere all alone?

Married with Children

So this summer I celebrated my seventh anniversary with my wonderful Husband Phat Tony. The other day I was reading in a magazine about having a seventh year itch anniversary party. Too bad I didn't read this earlier. I thought it was a cute idea. Anyway, it start me thinking about how long I have been married and all the things that have happened in the past seven years. The most important is the addition of our four boys. Just thinking about how many diapers I've changed, how many hugs I've given, and how many times I had to clean up vomit, I realize how much they have become my identity. I think if I was asked to introduce myself in a room of people it would be, HI, my name is Sarah and I'm the mom of four boys. That pretty much somes it up.
Okay and then there's the fact the I've been married for seven years. After seeing the article I thought, do I have the seven year itch. I actually don't. Tony is the man of my dreams so why would I get itchy feet over that. Besides who else would deal with me and I wouldn't want to raise the boys by myself. So that felt good realizing that I don't have the itch.
Then I started thinking about how I have changed. I'm going to be 31 in a couple of weeks. I was 23 when I got married. I have matured. I handle things a little better. I'm a little smarter. I think I'm a bit more organized. So even though my curves aren't as kickin' anymore, and my hair and make-up are rarely up to par, I think I might be a better housewife than I was at the beginning.
Now as a family things have changed. I think it took us awhile to figure things out but I like to think we finally have. We used to be like, A budget, whadget? Now I think we've become more financially responsible and we can see the light at the end of the tunnel. So we are at the point where we can keep up with maybe not the Jone's but the Johnson's lets say.
So we've got kids, wonderful husband, better self, and moving up in the world. Wow, when people say that marriage only gets better it looks like it could possibly be true.
Alright, as I re-read that I realized how cheesy it is. So I don't want it to sound like everything is totally wonderful and perfect. Sometimes I do tend to look at things with rose-colored glasses, but I think I truly like where we're at right now. I also have hope for the years to come. I know I have more maturing and growing to go and I hope I can see some progress in the next seven years.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Things I really like

So it's not that I didn't like the list that google came up with for me, but I decided to make a legitimate list of things I like.

1. Strawberry Licorice I don't really care for any other flavor. Twizzlers are the best but I'll eat red vines if I "have" to
2. Rain I actually just like the smell of it and how everything looks after it rains. Well, sometimes it's nice to be outside in it too. If I'm not going somewhere, but just playing in it.
3. Autumn I love the smells and the sights of fall. This is definitely my favorite season. Not too hot and not too cold. It's perfect.
4. Newborns You can't get any sweeter than this. I even love their cry. But the best thing about newborns is when you pick them up and they start to arch their backs. It is the cutest thing ever.
5. Campfires Just picture everyone around the fire calm and relaxed. It's dark out but everybody has a flickering light on their face. It smells perfect and you can sing songs, toast marshmallows, or just stare into the flames.
6. A certain green fruit often stuffed with pimento I had to put it on the list.
7. Road trips I love to go very far or just drive around for an hour. It doesn't matter, I just like it.
8. Taco Bell Have you ever had a chicken mexi-melt? Get one today. You won't regret it.
9. Game night I mostly enjoy doing this with my family, but if someones playing I want to be there too.
10. The color white This is my favorite color. I could go on about why I like white but I think it will suffice to say it's my favorite.
11. Chicken poop Ha ha ha (BTW, this is not really on the list)
12. Singing harmony I love doing this and I wish I could do it more often then just at church.
13. Silver white winters that melt into spring It just kind of felt a little "favorite things"ish
14. The number 14 This has been my favorite number for a long time. I can't remember why but I used to want 14 kids. Yeah, that's not going to happen.